Bullying happens to most people at some point in their lives and I know I am not alone when I tell my story, because many have a similar story and experience. Through my nearly 7 years of bullying, I have comfort ate, stopped eating, made myself sick to stop myself gaining weight, I've developed depression, nightmares, a lack of trust in people, a low self esteem, these are real consequences of bullying, think before you say something to someone.
I was a happy child, always smiling and laughing, I didn't have a care in the world. I had loads of friends, people liked me and enjoyed being with me. That all changed when I reached 12 years old and moved up to high school.
My first high school I went to, was a really small one. There was only 15 people in each year and as you can imagine, if you fell out with one person everyone hated you. Nobody in the class really liked me, I felt really alone. I was called names, I was pushed, I had the sleeves of my school jumper tied around a pole and the head mistress had to come un-tie me. I had my shoes and pencil case chucked on the school roof, a boy dug his nails really hard into my hands and I had marks for weeks. I hated the school and it was getting me down and making me miserable. My mum decided to move me to a slightly bigger school to start my second year of high school.
Moving to my new school, I really thought it would be a fresh new start, where I'd meet new people and be happy, I couldn't have been more wrong. After a week of being at the school it started all over again, but this time worse. There was one person in particular who made my life a living hell for 3 years and wouldn't stop at anything. Everyday he'd make some comment or do something to make me upset. His favourite insult was calling me a beached whale, it made me feel depressed and down, I hated my weight but he was just making things worse. It turned into a vicious cycle where I'd comfort eat to try and hide the pain, then when that didn't work I stopped eating to try and loose weight. I couldn't even stand at the bus stop without people making comments, at one point someone picked up a crisp packet off the ground and shoved it into my face telling me to go eat like the pig I was. Nobody stuck up for me, everybody laughed and found it funny. I tried not to show it hurt me but I couldn't help it. They wouldn't leave me alone. I told my mum who got in touch with the school but even then it didn't stop, it just got worse, he'd pick on me more, everytime I walked past him. I used to be allergic to food colouring and for a laugh he poured it onto me, I got sick and had to go home because I was covered in a rash. He didn't stop at anything, I realised he'd gone too far when he pushed me into the middle of the road when there was a bus and cars coming. His mum was called into the school but that made things worse. After that meeting he posted on facebook pictures of really overweight people that had been photoshopped and tagged me in them, everyone saw them and laughed and made fun of me. People said it was my fault, that I deserved it because of how fat I was. I got really scared about going to school because of what they'd do. Other boys started trying to push me downstairs, one boy even went as far as to cut of some of my hair. When I was nearly 15 I got my first proper boyfriend, who went to school with me, it made me really happy and he made me feel beautiful. He told me everyday that I was the most beautiful girl in the world. People made fun of me for it though, you see he had a form of autism and everyone thought he was weird. I was told "You choose him or having friends" I couldn't believe people would make you do that, I choose him because he was the only person who'd ever been properly nice to me. He called me babe a lot and when the boys in class heard that they started calling me a fat pig. In P.E they stole my clothes and started parading them about school, showing everyone how big they were, it made me cry. Someone who was meant to be my friend told me "If you were nicer then maybe people would like you" but I'd been nice and they didn't like me. I asked my mum if I could move schools and she agreed, it was hard moving school towards the end of high school but I really needed to. The bullying drove me and my boyfriend apart, I couldn't cope with the names people were calling him because of me. I moved schools, but I still heard the things people said. When my dad died, one girl said that I needed to stop being such an attention seeker and get over it. I didn't understand what I'd ever done wrong.
I moved to the school I'm at just now over 2 years ago, I made some friends and I seemed happy. I had a best friend, who I told everything to, unfortunately though she wasn't too great at keeping her mouth shut, she also told malicious lies and spread rumors about me. She told people that my dad was alive, I lied about him dying to get attention, she also told people I lied about being in the hospital and being ill, I just skived school all the time. She told people I'd been pregnant on nine occasions and I'd had 5 abortions, which was really not true as I've never been pregnant before in my life. She also said that I was infertile so she was going to have sex with my boyfriend and have my his baby. I couldn't believe all the stuff she was coming out with, all the while people believed her. It made me cry a lot. She eventually left school, but the consequences for me still haunt me everyday, no one wants to be my friend or talk to me because they think it's true what she said. I hate it but I live with it, because I know the truth about everything and if people choose to believe stupid lies and rumors like that then they're idiots. I've lost my ability to trust people, and I find it increasingly hard to make friends now because I always get hurt. I wish it was easier but I always try and remain strong. I've been rushed to hospital over 200 times in nearly 4 years, I've been to resusitation more times than I can count, I've nearly stopped breathing on several occasions yet they still don't believe me. I have to take one inhaler, 11 tablets and 4 breathings treatments per day, and that's just when I'm well, when I'm unwell it all goes up in numbers, yet still they don't believe me. I've nearly died before and yet still people think that all it is a case of is you take an inhaler and then you're fine, if only it were that simple...
Always remember that no matter what you're not alone, I'm always here for you
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